Yesterday’s sunshine and hope lasted well into the evening, and then there was an edge. An edge in my personality. Time went by slowly and wonderfully as we visited grandchildren, ate pizza, and walked to the shore of Lake Michigan. Later that evening we went to some dear friends and had a discussion concerning the choices we are all making, choices our local governments are making, and choices the Federal government is making. I had a revelation. First, I was more fearful for my own life than I had realized. When the kayak story was released, it reminded me why I took the trip: to celebrate my birthday and living into my sixth decade. That was unexpected. I aged knowing most men in my paternal family died young – and with lung cancer. My lungs! Why should I place myself in the super-healthy low risk slice on a pie chart, when I don’t know that? Second, I found myself getting really angry within the situation our Federal government has placed us. For forty-two years, I was a health care professional, and the issue of readiness was always in the forefront of anyone’s logical human mind. Then we had an election. And elected a horrid personality disorder who’s pathology leads to a lack of empathy and rational thought warped by a delusional ego. I’ve really wanted to keep politics out of this, but my statement is a fact based on diagnostic categories and backed up by the many professional groups, who stood outside of their usual ethical approaches to public figures and have made the same diagnosis. So now we suffer. So now we all run around trying to figure out a best scenario while the personality disordered sociopath stands in the middle and watches. Classic. I believe my edge is a sharp one, but well deserved; however, I have avoided the running around with my head cut off syndrome by choosing a quiet lifestyle during this era of our lives. The edge pops up here and there, and I dull it by writing and practicing a mindful approach to living a good life every day. Yesterday went great until it didn’t. And then there was an edge.